Showing posts with label tramadol fucks you up. Show all posts
Showing posts with label tramadol fucks you up. Show all posts

17.10.08

Lepht Anonym, now with 25% more implants and withdrawal.

so i got this magnetic implant sorted, which is fucking great. i can pick up paperclips, etc, scalpel blades and what you got, but even cooler, i can now feel strong electric currents and all kinds of magnetic fields. the piercer who did the implant has his own done already, and just putting our hands together, you could feel where the magnet was, this sort of weird tingling sensation that isn't what i expected at all. i figured it'd be the feeling of the magnet pulling against the top layer of skin, but it's different. i spent way too much money getting it done, but holy fuck was it worth it.

on the negative side, i also got reminded of why it is i don't have so many friends. a while ago, when the pain got pretty bad, i got a little loose with the alcohol - a few double whiskies in a couple evenings, and i had some cocodamol which i may or may not have been misusing by drinking. at any rate, i knew what i was doing, and i'm not doing it now, both of which sort of escaped a certain buddy of mine, one of about three people i'd been stupid enough to tell about what goes on with my health. said buddy jumped off the conclusion cliff and decided i was some sort of wrist-slashing self-harming alcoholic emo kid, and promptly went to tell my entire professional support network - academic advisor, doc, disability advisor, every fucker - everything the buddy thought was going on, plus a couple things i didn't want anyone knowing about, like the amount of time i've spent in the medical system and the fact that i can't control my own anger without injuring myself.

mostly, i managed to get it under control, but when it comes to the GP, i am boned. the doc doesn't exactly believe my addicted ass that i'm fine. i just got taken off every single painkiller i have, on a reduction regime, just like they give to fucking methheads. starting tomorrow i have codeine and nothing else, and two weeks from today i'm gonna be artificially, totally clean. with nothing to control what's actually fucking wrong with me.

i'm informed helpfully by the doc that 'to be totally honest, it sounds like it's psychological'. thanks, national health service. thanks, buddy who will not be named.

15.10.08

spiders on drugs

naw, i'm not showing that video again. it's storytime with Uncle Lepht.

i'm in the guided labs this morning, listening to Stromkern and keeping myself to myself, when the demonstrator - the grad student who gets lumped in with us and has to answer questions like, Breakpoints? Why would I want it to break? and Why's it doing that? - pounces on me.

"Lepht," he says (i'm translating), "what are you doing here?"

after i've gone "Whut? Huh? Whut?" over the music three or four times like some senile old professor with a malfunctioning hearing aid and finally turned the brick* off, i point out that i'm repeating this year of my undergrad degree. medical certificate, yo. demonstrator wonders why i'm not reusing last year's code, seeing as how the guided lab work's only updated every major Java version, if that. (* i mean, vintage Zen Touch.)

"It's shite code," i tell him. it is and all. last year i was too out of it to bother refactoring everything i write into something small and elegant, so it all just went into the compiler as i thought it up, and i don't think so neat'n'tidy.

"Oh," he goes. "That explains it. You know what it reminded me of?" i don't. "You know that old experiment where they put spiders on drugs, the ecstasy spider?"

yeah.

L

13.10.08

tramadol fucks you up?

tramadol fucked up yeah.
can tramadol fuck you up yep.
does tramadol fuck you up see above.
can i take solpadol with tramadol if you do it carefully, and you don't mind throwing up, sure.
can you get fucked up on tramadol
does tramadol fuck u up
does tramadol fuck you up?
does tramadol fucking you up?
does tramadol get you fucked up
fucked up on tramadol
how much tramadol can you take to get fucked up start with 50mg, titrate up in lots of 25mg until you're as fucked up as you like.
tramadol fuck u up
tramadol getting fucked up
tramadol how fucked up do you get pretty fucked up, but for real up-fuckedness you want some dihydro.

27.9.08

GPs and painkillers

if you're getting painkillers from your GP, presumably cause you actually need them and not just because you're addicted (here, that'd be a little from Column A, a little from Column B, and a little more to use as anaesthesia for surgery i was never supposed to perform) there are a few things you should never mention to them:

"Hey, it's been three years I've been on these things now."
"Yeah, they're making me sick and none of these antiemetics are working." (shouldn't have told her that before i tried the metoclopramide.)
"I'm on about 300mg a day, yeah."
"It's making my guts bleed coffee grounds. What'd you mean, haemorrhage?"
or especially, last time: "Ha ha, yeah I'm pretty much fucked without dihydrocodeine now."

i now have a grand total of 90mg per day to stop it all hurting. suffice to say this is like trying to stop up the city reservoirs with Blu-tak, and even this was a compromise between me, the addict / chronic pain patient, and the doc, in whose medical opinion i shouldn't be on anything at all and should, to use the medical terminology, suck it the fuck up. it kind of annoys me that i can't.

so, if you're sick and you need your meds, deal with your side-effects and damage yourself before you tell the jeep. they'll only take the meds away.

L

21.7.08

more pillhead searches

- will tramadol fuck you up
- fucked up on tramadol
- can tramadol fuck you up yep.
- "download whole albums for free" you can do it at Jamendo.
- can you take solpadol and tramadol together you shouldn't, but yeah. knock yourself out.
- tramadol fucks you up yes it does.
- does tramadol fuck you up
- will tramadol fuck me up
- how to get fucked up on tramadol take lots, add whiskey.
- tramadol fuck you up
- tramadol fucked up
- effects of coke and paracetamol i don't know, i can't get any Coke. or any coke.

suppository-sniffers.

20.5.08

tramadol still fucks you up

i remain the #1 Google hit for that, mostly due to my drug-seeking little clientele of Lijit users. so today, Lepht Anonym will answer your junkhead questions for fun and unprofit...

q. does tramadol fuck you up | a. at high enough doses.
q. tramadol fucks you up | a. yeah, it does.
q. fucked up on tramadol | a. you need about a gram if you've had opiates before, or a half a gram for newbies. start with a quarter and titrate up.
q. will tramadol fuck you up | a. yeah.
q. can tramadol fuck you up | a. yeah.
q. will tramadol fuck me up | a. YEAH.
q. tramadol getting fucked up | a. see above. and do it with a mate, cause you can OD pretty easily and the side effects are nasty.
q. how much tramadol will fuck you up | a. depends. if you've never taken it before, take it a capsule at a time in 20minute intervals and find out. otherwise a gram.
q. will tramadol fuck u up | a. IT FUCKS YOU UP, alright?
q. solpadol or tramadol | a. Solpadol will fuck you up less, but has a different analgesic action. one or the other might not work alone; for maximum fucked-upness, i'd recommend taking them together... junkhead.
q. tramadol fucked up | a. it's not as fucked up as dihydro.
you fucking pillheads.

L

17.5.08

new hardware

i finally have replacement hardware, a Lenovo laptop replete with Windows Vista. Fedora Core 9 comes out on Tuesday, so i'll be jacked up and Linified by Tuesday night and waiting to dump more newbie-hacker crap on y'all. i also have new custom ink lined up for then, and a couple new piercings doing their best to heal up within the confines of my slightly shit immune system, plus new (hot) Scottish nookie, so all in all i'm a pretty happy little bastard right now. i might even have a job.

anyway. few challenges are gonna be working with the Broadcomm chipset for wireless under Core 8 (i seem to remember that needing madwifi), making the weird combo memory card reader and the fingerprint auth device work at all - especially the fingerprinter, i'll be fucking chuffed if i can get that shit working. it's a swiper rather than a presser, too, which makes it harder to hack; i'd want to dust the keyboard, monitor and case for prints, relief one into a mould and make a gelatine finger to test that before i could say i was sure though. biosecurity is pretty cool, but we've all seen it's far from infallible.

does give me a little more trust in Windows, though, although disturbingly i don't think the regular auth protocol has been disabled in favour of fingerprints. i'd have passwords required as well as prints, or as a backup only if the prints failed, but not as an either-or option...

so kids, fingerprints are fun but won't keep the robbers away, Scots are all hardcore motherfuckers, and remember - Tramadol fucks you up.

L

30.4.08

unplugged

so i'm sat in the lab, trying to follow Baal's Bum through Genesis. this isn't an easy task, especially when you've already slogged through the fucker once and you're opiated up to the nipples, and especially when you're unplugged.

that's right, it's Mental Detox Week, the seven days in every year when people like me, who fucking hate adverts, get yelled at by Kalle Lasn to turn the damn electricals off before we rot our modern brains out around our crappy, overpriced iPod headphones. i'm following it, as it happens, but not by choice.

you've all (both of you) seen me bitching and ranting about passing out in random places. it happens on the street too, and turns out that's not so good for all the shit in my pockets. i have no fucking clue how i didn't figure out this was gonna happen before it did, cause it's pretty damn obvious when you think about it, but in the space of three days i've smashed the shit out of the little iPod someone really close to me gave me a few years ago, and my one and only piece of computer hardware, my Fedora Core 8 laptop. they're both totalled, and it's 100% my own stupid junkie fault.

so i'm on my fourth day now with no Linux and no music, and holy crap am i feeling it. i'm so sick of the Windows XP boxes in the labs that i honestly have no idea how i managed to use this operating system, let alone try and hack anything with it, for so long. i'm also on the verge of stabbing someone with my penknife (yeah, all four centimetres of blunt blade we're allowed to carry here in Europe's favourite police state) - i never realised how obnoxious people are when you can hear them.

Kalle, man, you're not convincing me.

L

13.4.08

paracetamol

part of my pain control regime is Remedeine Forte, the 30mg kind, otherwise known as dihydrocodeine tartrate. it's got a little booklet taped shut to the front of the bottle, so when you finally get the fucker open, you find out each 30mg dose of useful opiate also comes with its synergistic ingredient, paracetamol (or acetaminophen for you Yanks).

drug synergy is pretty cool. it's a phenomenon whereby the effects of two synergistic drugs are more, when they're combined, than the effects of taking them both separately. that is to say, paracetamol-dihydrocodeine is stronger than paracetamol and then dihydrocodeine.

there's just one thing. i take anywhere from two to five of these fuckers in a day, with the aid of a lot of Coke and Jaffa Cakes. so, 500*4, let's say...

that's an average in a day of two grams of paracetamol. my liver must be crying.

me, i'm laughing; this stuff's starting to affect me less negatively than it did, i have no exams to pass this year at all (being a cripple), and i'm full of caffeine. it's freezing in here, too, and thanks to the side-effects of said synergy, i can't even feel that. more temperature implant musings at some point.

L

6.4.08

withdrawal

i'm trying to deal with the above motherfucker right now (it being 2:52 in the morning) and it's not working. if you know kiddies who think it's cool to be addicted to opiates, and i do, do me a favour and slap them out of it; this is what you get. pain that's worse than the one you're taking the fucking things for. insomnia cranked up to utter sleeplessness. physical and psychological total dependence on a drug to which your body becomes more resistant day by day, just as day by day you need it more and more, and the doctors become less and less willing to give it to you. you eat too much, you drink too much, you can't work or think or do anything worth doing, and you know it isn't going to get better. i fucking hate this.

anyway, my point is that there are ways of dealing with it, they just don't always work (like tonight). in an attempt to distract myself, i'm sharing my, uh 'wisdom' when it comes to coping with either withdrawal or severe pain - same strategy, different applications. in no particular order:

- distractions. you can't erase pain, but you can make your brain think about something else at the same time. whatever you do don't just lie there hoping it will get better; that way you have no distractions and you just make it worse. internet shopping is good, so is doing your core comps or chilling with your buddies. hit ICQ and talk to someone.

- the old English cure. where i'm from, if you told someone you had terminal leukaemia, their response would be Poor cunt. Sit down and have a cup of tea. laced with Russian Standard, it actually works pretty fucking well, i gotta say.

- get your ass in the hot shower. sounds stupid, but it helps, especially if you got a shower radio (i find some Subway to Sally helps. get it on the Pirate Bay!)

- of course, if you could get your hands on some wimbawe, everyone knows it has a medicinal effect. unfortunately everyone also knows the government hates wimbawe and all who sail on it.

- don't get wasted (a little overeasy is fine). it doesn't help and the combination of alcomahol and drug withdrawal will just make you throw up. likewise try and fight the compulsion to overeat, as you won't throw up, you'll just bloat and sit there for nine hours feeling like you need to throw up.

- play some Xbox if you have it, or Amiga or whatever. personally i don't have any of that shit, but if i did, it'd sure fucking help.

so yeah, gonna try and sleep some now. i'll probably be back before long with more inane, self-pitying tripe.

L

31.3.08

users want:

does tramadol fuck you up
virgin anal
solpadol
tramadol fuck u up
tramadol fuck you up
get fuckedup on tramadol
holy virgin mary anal
tramadol, does it fuck you up
tramadol will fuck you up
fucked up off tramadol
how to get fucked up on tramadol
plastized people
tramadol fucked up
will tramadol fuck you up
can tramadol get me fucked up?
virgin mary anal
i'm pleased to report that y'all have moved on, having added virgin anal to your repertoire as well as getting yourselves fucked up on tramadol... honestly, i want to meet all three of you one day. you sound like you'd make for one hell of a night.

L

PS. the catholic guy looking for Virgin Mary anal - get in there!

10.3.08

tramadol fucks you up #1113203

yeah, it's that time of the something again:

tramadol fuck me up
do tramadol fuck u up
how much tramadol does it take to get fucked up
can tramadol fuck you up?
solpadol tramadol
will tramadol fuck you up[
tramadol fucked up
does tramadol fuck you up?
hack userpic i'm not teaching you how to create malicious images just so you can go fuck up a Windows user or two.

"tramadol fucks you up" is so gonna be the title of my autobiography.

L

18.2.08

guess what fucks you up

# does tramadol fuck you up
# tramadol fuck you up
# tramadol fucked up
# will tramadol fuck up up
# can you get fucked up on tramadol
# get fucked up on tramadol
# does tramadol get you fucked up?
# does tramadol get you fucked up
# can tramadol fuck you up
# tramadol getting fucked up
# tramadol get you fucked up
# Anonym
# solpadol
# fucked up tramadol
oh it'll 'fuck up up' alright. once again, ladies and gents, tramadol fucks you up.

L

10.1.08

your weekly 'tramadol fucks you up':

1. will Tramadol fuck me up
3. how long for tramadol to exit
4. does tramadol fuck you up?
6. tramadol fucked up
7. solpadol
9. tramadol does it fuck you up?
10. what does tramadol do to you?
11. tramadol fuck up


don't really surprise me no more. for the information of my tramhead readers, it takes about six hours for the effects of tramadol to wear off, seven for the drug to exit your system totally - at least in my case, it'll vary hugely (we're talking by like three hours here). i've talked about what tramadol does already; go and find out for yourselves if you wanna know that bad, or just take the fucking drugs and see what happens.

once again, ladies and gentlemen, tramadol fucks you up.

L

25.12.07

guess what tramadol does

# can tramadol fuck you up
# tramadol fucks me up
# solpadol
# does tramadol fuck you up?
# what does tramadol
# does tramadol fuck you up
# tramadol fuck you up
i like the guy asking "what does tramadol" - ask the others, bro, it fucks you up.

17.12.07

for the last time:

tramadol fuck you up?
"windows scripting host\settings\timeout"
how much tramadol fucks you up
will tramadol fuck you up
does tramadol fuck you up
solpadol
does Tramadol fuck you up ?
YES, for fuck's sake, tramadol fucks you up. it fucks you up bad. you won't be able to program properly, you sure as shit won't be able to do maths, you won't even feel like trying to do sports or anything active, you'll throw up all the time, you'll look and sound like an authentic pothead and you'll lose any interest you ever had in anything but sleep.

[kudos to the guy who kept looking for the Registry setting that messes with the WSH's timeout, though. it's under HKLM/Software/Microsoft/Windows iirc, and its main malicious use is to get rid of the timeout completely so viruses can run free and never be killed because of inactivity.]

mang, i hope i don't get readers who hate profanity.

L

13.12.07

users want:

anonym for pain (yeah, that's why i'm constantly drugged up until i resemble Mike Huckabee at a NASA briefing. i LOVE pain.)
tramadol fuck (ha ha, not on tramadol you won't.)
java lab + quizes (you want the Patent Lepht Method.)
does tramadol fuck you up (yep.)
anonym (it makes me laugh that they're never actually looking for me...)
pronounce antonym (... just for their grammar homework. here's a tip, Murikans: the crippled hacker is Anonym (ann-onn-im), the grammatical construction is an ANTONYM (ann-ton-im). there's a fucking T in there.)

3.12.07

idiocy surpasses itself

straight after i say it can't get stupider than using no AV, no less. this month, people have been mostly searching for:

4. solpadol - i'm not even on Solpadol anymore.
5. ilove you - i get the feeling this guy might want my underwear or something.
6. ilove you 2 - he should just get together with this guy.
7. tramadol fuck you up? - i heard this in a Chinese accent. oh ya, fuck you up real bad, really sick, fuck you guts up nasty, mm.
8. anonym for understand - not when you talk like that i fucking don't.
9. can i crush solpadol tablets? - categorically, no. crushing them results in something that tastes like a sluice farm smells, i can tell you.

you gotta wonder, don't you.

L

26.11.07

i say, google, does tramadol or does it not fuck you up?

this week's net belches:

4. tramadol fucks you up (1 time) yes, yes it does.
5. Sapiens Windows (1 time) I'M INFESTEEEED!
7. "jacked in" (1 time) always was, always will be...

plus your average quotient of number string DDoS attempts, idiot Yanks looking for antonyms of words you shouldn't need to Google anyway, even a couple people who were actually looking for me.

but who the fuck actually feels the need to search for "tramadol fucks you up"?

L

6.11.07

Lepht's not dead yet

and that little interlude was due to the upgrade from 800mg Solpadol a day to 850 Tramadol. that shit fucks with your head; i've been slurring at my fellow students, i missed two assignments of my own and i partially recall asking my doc "if there's any... unTramadol... in your, in your cupboard?" having forgotten i was on it and had a shot or two of schnapps.

so yeah, i ain't dead, and i'll be back as soon as i can type properly again.


L